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Between the left and right field foul poles at newly re-named "Yellow Book Park" a glaring 47 advertisements are aggregately littered from left to right. This is not an exact figure, but instead my best guess. It was a difficult task due to both the exhaustion and dizzyness that stupified my senses. I tried, I really did, but trying to figure out the most logical way to sort through the levels of advertisements, along with trying not to get sidetracked by their various appeals was a total mind f***. It's really a wonderful aesthetic though, so long as you like or have interest in Modells, Wise snacks, Pepsi, Diet Pepsi, another kind of pepsi I can't remember, IZod, Chevrolet, Budweiser, Dunkin Donuts, Geico, Nikon, or even if you just want to re-decorate your home with Bob's furniture.

*deep breath*

I guess the reason I bring this up is because I took my mom on a mother/son date to the park last night. It was her first time to Big Citi and she thought for the most part it is a tremendous upgrade from Shea. The architecture, it's ode to the past, unique angles and undeniable charm are all grade A.

But, what I truly enjoyed the most was the fact that instead of having to give vague descriptions of the location of certain landmarks, now all I had to do was tell her which sign to look for. For instance, I was explaining to her about Ike Davis' gorgeous power stroke to right field. I mentioned that he has hit home runs clearing the Modells, Wise Snacks, Pepsi, Dunkin Donuts, and Subway signs already this year. Even more enjoyable than that was the little Carvel ice cream logo on the mammouth centerfield scoreboard underneath the batter profile and at-bat summary. We also got a kick out of 1-800 Flowers sponsoring the kiss cam. I'm also pretty sure the grounds crew was sponsored by AAMCO, but I can't verify that for you.

In right field, the second deck hangs directly over the first, an ode presumably to the old Tigers stadium. The foul pole touches up against the second deck in its direct vertical stack. This would be a very charming touch if not for the three different pepsi ads, and the giant Subway and Verizon ads below it. In other words, if they had just left the decks as they were (black), or at the least not put a urine yellow (water deprived yellow hue) Subway sign hanging over a black fence with an orange line, perhaps it would stand out less than Lady Gaga's inner thighs.

Soon enough, the Shea Bridge will be re-named after Vibe, home runs after auto loans, and the infield dirt by Wendy's. A picture of Wendy herself will surely be carved into the outfield grass, much like the New York City skyline was at times in centerfield at Big Shea.

But it's ok though. Even though the Mets have successfully turned their new ballpark into the Yellow Pages, it's still a gem. It's just unfortunate that the Mets had to take resort to these measures. But that's what happens when you get Madoff'd, Freddy.


-Tom Greenhalgh (6/23/10)